Life

I've always wondered, as maybe others do, about how life works. More specifically the psychology of life. I think this is why I've been taking so many psychology classes. I have been hoping to find answers to all these questions about my life leading up to college. I cannot say that my life was horrible, but I cannot say that is was the greatest thing in the world. This is mainly thanks to my school experiences. Well what I consider in my mind. The main question I wonder is whether people influence your behavior or whether it is from birth. I wonder if things are just in my head or if I am actually experiencing them. In my previous school experiences I have had only one friend. Everyone else I considered mean and inconsiderate. Was it just me? I had only one friend that I could hang out with without feeling that I belonged. Everyone else seem to have their secret worlds that I was not allowed to be a part of. I felt that people around me were extremely competitive and wanted to prove they were better than me at something. Either that or feel they had a power over me just because I was quiet. I am not at all polished at explaining things so this might sound stupid or confusing. What I think I am trying to say is that I have felt threatened all these years and then I come to college and it all changes. I have more than one friend and people want to accept me into their lives. It's wonderful, but I notice that I am still the exact same person that I was throughout my school experiences. So it makes me wonder why I had these experiences.